We wish we were joking. First this, from UPI, Feb. 18:

US skies to be opened to drones
WASHINGTON — A new federal law allows commercial drones to fly over the United States by late 2015, officials said. The drone language was included in a funding bill for the Federal Aviation Administration signed Tuesday by President Obama...

Gurbanguli Berdymukhamedov was sworn in as Turkmenistan's president Feb. 17, having won last week's election with a thoroughly predictable 97% of the vote. The seven token competitors were all from the same Democratic Party of Turkmenistan, the only on permitted. Several of them praised the incumbent during the race. The primary Western monitoring group, the Organization for Security and Cooperation in Europe (OSCE), declined to even send observers, citing the lack of real competition. An elaborate inauguration ceremony was attended by some 3,000 in the capital, Ashgabat, but no foreign leaders attended. Congratulatory messages were sent by Belarusian President Alyaksandr Lukashenka, Ukrainian President Viktor Yanukovych, Uzbek leader Islam Karimov, Turkish President Abdullah Gul, and Azerbaijan's Ilham Aliyev. With natural gas reserves estimated to be the world's fourth largest—exceeding those of the US—Turkmenistan is strategically critical. The hydrocarbon wealth is being used to consolidate support for the regime, with household gas, water and electricity all provided free (and families receiving monthly rations of salt). And Berdymukhamedov says he wants both greater foreign investment and transition to a multi-party system. But the regime remains one of the most autocratic on earth, and Berdymukhamedov is starting more and more to mirror his notoriously megalomaniacal predecessor, Saparmurat Niyazov...

The government of Cyprus has launched a second licensing round for offshore exploratory drilling amid hopes that new fossil fuel deposit discoveries will boost the eurozone country's drooping economy, with record unemployment and a near-junk status credit rating due to its banks' high exposure to Greek debt. An initial licensing round in 2007 only won interest from US firm Noble Energy—which discovered a huge find of some 8 trillion cubic feet of natural gas. Last year, it began drilling in Block 12, the southeastern section of the Cypriot economic zone, which sits close to a large Israeli gas field. However, the effort is raising tensions with Turkey—which claims that blocks included in the second licensing round are within its continental shelf. The Cypriot Foreign Ministry called the claim "unfounded and contrary to international law." The statement said: "The Republic of Cyprus calls on Turkey to end its illegal, provocative and arrogant behavior, to steer clear from issuing threats and to adhere to the UN Convention on the Law of the Sea."

India's Central Bureau of Investigation (CBI) is pledging an in-depth investigation after the Feb. 9 killing of controversial fugitive paramilitary leader Kartam Surya in a road ambush by presumed militants of the outlawed Communist Party of India (Maoist)—better known as Naxalites—in Sukma district of Chhattisgarh state. Dubbed the "Scourge of the Maoists," Surya, 29, began his career in counter-insurgency as a "Special Police Officer" in 2005, when the semi-official corps was created. The SPOs are leaders of an irregular anti-guerilla force known as the Salwa Judum, overseen by the official security forces. Surya grew to head his own Salwa Judum militia, the "Surya Group" or "Koya Commandos," which was trained by the Grey Hounds, an elite unit of the state police of Andhra Pradesh (bordering Chhattisgarh on the south). A Chhattisgarh state police honor guard attended his funeral, and state government officials honored him as the "Bastar Tiger," after the southern region of Chhattisgarh where he operated. But rights groups objected to this lionization; petitions filed with India's Supreme Court accuse Judum members and SPOs of over 500 murders, 99 rapes and 103 acts of arson.

The UN General Assembly voted on Feb. 16 to condemn Syria through a non-binding resolution. The resolution supports a plan advanced by the Arab League that aims to bring the situation in Syria to a close as quickly as possible by encouraging President Bashar al-Assad to step down. There were 12 votes against the resolution including Russia, China, Iran and Bolivia.

It is really, really a drag to have to do this, but we really have no choice. Whatever legitimate reasons there are to oppose Henrique Capriles Radonski, it doesn't let the Hugo Chávez political machine off the hook for the most vulgar Jew-baiting. Once again, the chavistas serve up propaganda ammo on the proverbial silver platter for the corporate media to shoot right back at them. Fools. From Reuters, Feb. 17:

Carlos Pérez, one of four El Universo managers convicted of libel against Ecuadoran President Rafael Correa, was granted asylum by Panama on Feb. 17. El Universo is the second largest newspaper in Ecuador. Two of the four men, Cesar and Nicolas Pérez, have already fled to Miami. The announcement that Carlos Pérez had been granted asylum came after Ecuador's National Court of Justice upheld the conviction against the four El Universo managers. The men were sentenced to three years in prison each and fined $40 million in total. Correa indicated that he was surprised that Panama granted the men asylum because, in his view, they were common criminals and not persecuted political activists. He also stated that he was considering pardoning the men. El Universo officials stated they will bring an appeal to the Inter-American Commission on Human Rights to fight the verdict.

Human Rights Watch on Feb. 16 called for the reduction of overcrowding to improve poor prison conditions in Latin America following a prison fire in Honduras. The fire occurred two days earlier and killed more than 300 inmates while injuring dozens more. According to HRW, Honduras prisoners suffer overcrowding which leads to poor prison conditions including inadequate nutrition and sanitation, as well as the tragic result earlier this week. Americas Director at HRW, Jose Miguel Vivanco, stated, "The tragic deaths of hundreds of inmates, one of the worst incidents of its kind in the region, are ultimately the result of overcrowding and poor prison conditions, two longstanding problems in Honduras." According to local press, Honduras has 24 prisons with a total capacity of 8,000. These prisons currently hold 13,000 prisoners, well over capacity.